By Denise George
Correspondent, The Alabama Baptist
During a family dinner many years ago my then 5-year-old son, Christian, sat at the food-laden table eyeing my dad, his grandfather. He watched closely as Daddy — a tall, strong man with a deep kind voice — lead us in prayer and then skillfully carved the giant turkey, serving generous portions to every member of the family.
Christian turned to me and with eyes wide he whispered: “Mommy, is Granddaddy God?”
“No son,” I said and smiled. “Granddaddy’s not God but he’s real close.”
Why do fathers matter?
Fathers matter to their children. Whether for good or bad, human dads paint a portrait of the heavenly Father for their little ones.
If a dad is trustworthy, dependable, kind, compassionate and loving, his children will view their heavenly Father with those attributes. If a dad is emotionally distant, unloving, critical, harsh or abusive, his children will believe God behaves in the same ways.
Fathers carry a huge responsibility in rearing up godly, well-adjusted children who may one day become parents themselves.
What makes a good father?
What makes a good father? The same characteristics we find in our heavenly Father.
Good fathers:
• Protect, provide and teach.
A godly father points his children to Christ, teaching them to pray and study God’s Word, encouraging them to love and connect with their heavenly Father. He protects his children when they are young and then teaches them how to operate their developing wings. When their wings are fully grown, he blesses them, allows them to fly and teaches them to bear spiritual fruit. He guides them throughout their developing lives, giving them both sturdy spiritual roots and strong capable wings.
• Are welcoming, compassionate and approachable.
In his book, “Soul Survivor,” Philip Yancey tells of an old Japanese saying that lists the four most awful things on earth as “fires, earthquakes, thunderbolts and fathers.” How sad that a child would fear his father. Christian fathers love their children, discipline with loving kindness and open their arms in the same way Jesus Himself welcomed the little children into His life (Matt. 19:13–14).
• Accept, affirm and encourage.
When a father accepts, affirms and encourages a child, he offers a lifelong blessing. Chap and Dee Clark, in their book “Daughters and Dads: Building a Lasting Relationship,” write: “To bless our children is to hand them a lifelong gift of emotional, relational, familial and spiritual rootedness. When we express to our kids how we believe in them as people, we help create an environment where their minds and hearts are shaped according to that blessing.”
• Are role models who are dependable, trustworthy and present.
Scripture tells us that our heavenly Father’s name is Yahweh-Shammah, meaning: “the Lord is there” (Ezek. 48:35). God’s Word makes promises to His children about His constant presence and availability — promises that can be depended upon and trusted. Children need fathers who are physically and emotionally present, keep their promises and are actively involved in their everyday lives.
• Love their children consistently and unconditionally.
Children need to know their father loves them and will stand by them through good and bad times, no matter how they might disappoint or fail their father. A dad’s unconditional love ensures consistency and security and helps guide the child into an eternal relationship with his loving heavenly Father. H. Norman Wright, in his book “Making Peace with Your Past,” writes: “In our Father God we have absolute stability and security. We have a parent who is consistently wise and good and our position as His children is assured.” Consistent unconditional love is a father’s precious gift to a child — a love that won’t quit.
Editor’s Note — Denise George is author of 31 books, including “Teach Your Children to Pray” (Christian Focus Publishers). She is married to Timothy George, founding dean of Beeson Divinity School at Samford University in Birmingham. Photo of Brian and Sam Anderton of Hunter Street Baptist Church, Hoover, courtesy of Ashley Anderton.
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