By Grace Thornton
The Alabama Baptist
Two years ago on a Sunday morning, Jeff and Penny Bonner saw life change in an instant.
Their middle child, Michael, was driving back to the University of Alabama after a weekend at home in Montgomery, and he never made it there.
“He was killed instantly in a car accident,” Penny Bonner said.
The Longest Night
In the years since, the couple has walked a painful road, leaning on God and trusting that He has purpose in their pain. And they’ve looked for ways to help other people going through the same thing.
“Holidays are always hard for people who are grieving,” she said. “Ever since we lost him, we’ve talked about having some kind of service of remembrance not just for Michael but for so many people who have experienced the loss of a loved one — children, mothers and fathers, grandparents, brothers and sisters.”
That idea will become a reality Dec. 21 at 7 p.m. at their church, Taylor Road Baptist, Montgomery, through an event called The Longest Night. For people who are grieving, night is often the hardest time of the day, and the holidays are often the hardest time of year. Dec. 21 — the actual longest night of the year because of the winter solstice — embodies that hard time, Pastor Daniel Atkins said.
He said the event’s purpose is to “minister to a segment of our population and our church culture in our city that seem to be the forgotten ones at Christmas.” For many Christmas used to be joyful, but now someone’s seat is empty at the table, and that makes people who are grieving want to retreat from all the holiday festivities.
The Longest Night service will acknowledge that, give people room to grieve and focus on the reason why Christmas exists — Jesus, the one who came so that death would be defeated.
“We are going to remember the loved ones that we lost and anticipate the Second Coming of Christ, when He swallows up death,” Atkins said.
Purpose in pain
It’s one way the church can speak into a hurting world, he said — to offer those who are grieving the chance to come and “just be loved on” for the night. The songs and everything else will be geared toward those feeling the pain of loss. And the Bonners will share their story.
Jeff Bonner said they’re hoping The Longest Night will allow people who are at all different levels of grieving to come together and support each other during the difficult times they each are facing.
“That’s our goal — to let people know they are not alone,” he said. “We want people to be able to mourn in whatever way they want to and find comfort in meeting other people who are right where they are.”
The Bonners both say that they believe God has a purpose for their pain, and they believe part of it may be to encourage other people who are struggling through the death of a child or another loved one.
“We hope to see His kingdom glorified that night,” Jeff Bonner said.
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